Gallows (Literally) Humor

Wolfgang Puck, the Los Angeles chef who is no stranger to the self-promotion game, grabbed a few more headlines this past week with the announcement that his restaurants from now on would only serve humanely raised and killed meat, and no more foie gras. He did, however, mention that lobsters would still be dispatched the old way, by being cut in half with a cleaver because, he candidly admitted, "the meat tastes better that way." One large step for mollifying PETA, one giant leap for coddling the palate. One has to wonder why it took the good cook this long to get a conscience. Couldn't possibly be because he put his nose in the air and sniffed increased profits wafting on the winds of change, could it? Naaaah. I heard Puck being interviewed the other day on NPR, the perfect platform for reaching the squeamish souls who prefer knowing the calf didn't suffer on its way to becoming their vitello piccata. The really unsettling thing about the broadcast was hearing Puck, in his Teutonic accent and sounding just a bit like the governator, conflating the practices of the meat industry with the execution of human prisoners. "Zey alvays are looking for better vays to do it," he said with a disconcerting chuckle, proud to align himself on the side of humanity.